I hate my mother . any advice out there?

Im sick of her .dont give me "she gave birth to you, be respectful and thankful blahblah" because, believe me,i wish she hadnt.shes south east asian ,so yes,she has her own cultures.but me,im half white, i grew up in the middle east,the pacific islands and a few western countries .my dad wasnt around for a few years of my life,(i mean.he was,but he was away for more than half the year most years) because of work , and so i grew up with my 'mother' and the nannies. sure,she cooked dinner,raised me and my brother who is 6 years younger than me,but hey! she had maids to clean everything and nannies to look after us . yet,she claimed she had so much work to do and she was so stressed.and now im 14,my dad doesnt do the same kind of job and he just works from 8 to 5 now. but im not getting along with my mother,infact ive never got along with her. i cant talk to her about anything ! anything at all,because .. she twists it around. i have to cook dinner every night.our maid goes home before dinner time , so i do the dishes.on the weekends,the maid doesnt work,i do everything.why doesnt she? she doesnt work by the way.she sits on her *** ,goes and plays cards with her friends . im not allowed to date,im not even allowed to bring that subject up.i have polycystic ovary syndrome,its a problem with my ovaries that makes my hormones swing wildly out of balance .so i get my period sometimes only three times a year and it comes with excruciating pain,it also causes acne thats very hard to rid of and excess body hair.there is a cure for this,the birth control pill.but she doesnt trust me enough to let me go on it.so i have to put up with all this ****,just because she doesnt trust me.ive never done anything wrong,im not some kid whos run away and has been on drugs,smokes or anythng.but she doesnt trust me.ive been beat up by her so many times.with things from her fists with rings on them,to wooden hangers.for what reason? because i didnt keep my room tidy,because i didnt hear her when she called me .i dont look like her at all,my features are from my dads side.and she doesnt like my dads side of the family . my grandmother from my dads side doesnt like her because of the way she treat me and just my her as a person.so my mother and my grandmother hate each other. i look like my grandmother when she was young,and maybe that annoys my mother.but everytime i do something wrong, she says " your a witch just like your grandmother" shes always telling me to just go live with her and go away.the woman wont even let me read books , because its a waste of time, i can only study once ive finished all the dishes,and she expects me to get top grades.i have a plan , i want to work my *** off now im highschool, go to uni,finish , work,pay my parents back for whatever they lent me for uni and then cut off all ties.i dont want her to ever meet my children and i will be the complete opposite when i raise mine .some days i wonder what if i just stick a knife through me,jump under a train.would that be better ?then i would drag her into hell with me.dont tell me that deep down she loves me,because i know she doesnt .every friend that comes to my house asks me if shes my real mom.im sick of this.everytime someone at school mentions how much they love their mom , i start crying .i would give anything just for a mom like the ones my friends have. you might wonder why i dont just talk to my dad about this?he loves her,so much . hell i dont know why. she has threatened to leave and had him on his knees many times before.ive tried talking , but "shes your mother , you have to learn to respect that",im never good enough for her. and ive spend too many years praying that we would get along , or that she would love me . but im tired of that . and she doesnt deserve my prayers .i could run away but i dont want to, my life would be perfect without her.and i love where i live , i need my dad to pay for my uni and im living in a foreign country.and speaking of uni.shes always going on about how hard i should work since my dad is going to pay for my uni.but..my dad paid for two of her brothers to go to uni for a total of 6 years . HER BROTHERS ! AND IM HER GOD FORSAKEN DAUGHTER . shes always picking on my looks , my posture , the way i dress . she says i waste too much time talking to my friends via my blackberry and laptop. but when you dont have a mother to talk you , wouldnt you spend more of your time talking to your friends , the only people you can talk to . and when youve moved 7 bloody countries in 14 years,dont you think you would want to keep in contact with people?i dont know , i dont know , but right now i want to write a letter telling her how much i hate her and jump off my bloody balcony .does anyone have any advice at all ?.dont say therapy , because she refuses to accept the fact that i might be stressed because apparently i have no reason to be - rolls eyes- and no , talking to the ***** will not